So I’ve decided to write down the things that I find most
“noticeable” while it is still fresh in my mind. It is quite amazing how quickly a new
environment becomes normal and you no longer are aware of the things that made
no sense at first or the cultural nuisances that you can easily adopt or let go
of for the sake of integration and adapting to a new setting. We all do it, and well I have gotten in
trouble in the past for not sharing the shocking/noticeable things. Yeah, so my sister came to visit and she
ended up giving me the silent treatment for like 8 hours because I forgot to
mention some things to her back in 2007 when she visited me in Burkina
Faso. Understandably, she was upset and
flustered because I forgot to tell her that as our taxi comes into the bus
station there will be many men who will swarm the taxi and begin to reach for
our bags. No they are not thieves (well
most of them aren’t), they are just overzealous luggage loaders I guess you can
call them. They are trying to make sure
that you ride with them instead of with another bus; they simply want your
service. The best way to handle them is
with a firm, “no,” and then, simply moving along to the bus you want to ride. So this list of “noticeable” things is especially
for you, Sugar. I do want to put a
disclaimer though, that some things that may be shocking to another person
travelling from the states if it is their first time outside of the comforts of
America, may not be shocking to me. Also,
some of these things are probably documented in other places, by people who
have traveled in the past. I usually try
not to read anything other than safety warnings because well, the “what the
what’s” of life are often times quite comical in retrospect. My list is candid and my honest thoughts as I
experienced these things. No disrespect
to any person anywhere in the world, I doubt I will be offensive, but just in
case, I am just telling it to you from the way I saw it at first…my perspective
will likely change over time. Nonetheless,
here we go!
Dear
India,
Here is a list of things that I must say shocked me when I
got here. I am not sure how quickly I
will get over them, some fast, some slow, and some never. Some things I enjoy and quite frankly may adopt
into my own life. This is my list to you
because I really just want to know, “what the what?!”
1. - The
“bobble head” nod. Americans, do
this activity so you can understand.
Step 1: Shake your head yes. Step
2: Shake your head no. Step 3: Shake
your head, “I don’t know”. I am not sure
how else to describe the head shake here for yes other than bobble head like,
or like you cannot really decide if you want to say yes or no. It is like you are shaking water out of each
ear when you get out of the pool, but just faster. Now imagine what it is like to get off of the
airplane and you ask someone a question like, “am I going in the right
direction to get to gate 17?” and they start sideways/bobble head shaking at
you. There is no expression on their
face…not friendly, not foelike. Just a
shake. WHAT THE WHAT?! What does that even mean? Yes is an up and down motion…this sideways
thing just looks like you are not sure you know what you want to say, that or
you are trying to get an attitude with me.
I may never get completely over this one…but I am getting used to it.
2. - “OK-OK-OK-OK-OK-OK-OK”
Gesh! Give me a minute to talk! So
Americans, imagine you are talking to someone. (this is the part where you say
“uh-huh/mm-hmm”) and they just keep saying, “ok, ok,ok” as you are
speaking. Wouldn’t you think that they
are trying to get you to shut up? Well actually
they are not, its kind of like the Indian “uh-huh/mm-hmm”. And to you my Indian friends, when I say
“uh-huh” I am not asking you to repeat yourself, I am acknowledging that I am
following the conversations. It is to
say I am with you. So either you are
going to have to stop repeating yourself or I am going to have to start saying
ok a million times while you are talking so you know I am with you. More than likely I will have to give in here,
or I am just going to get tired of hearing you repeat your sentence because I
said “uh-huh”…I assume I will adopt the ”ok,ok,ok,ok” method. Sorry American friends if I start doing this
unconsciously with you. I do not want
you to shut up.
3. - Traffic. In the city roads it’s like New York meets,
LA, meets, organized chaos! On top of
that as an American, I must say that I always look the wrong way when crossing
the street because you all drive on the opposite side of the street from us. I’M CONFUSED!
And scared for my life at times because much like NY drivers, it seems
like you all are intending to run over pedestrians to let them know you are the
boss. Last thing. If everyone honks their horns at the same
time no one gets the message. I never
know if you are honking at me, or the cars, or just honking for general
purpose. Maybe you are honking because
someone thought it was a good idea to paint on the back of several different
types of service vehicles for people to honk at them. Why was that a good idea? I have no idea. I am learning to look the right way to cross
the street, thank heavens, and sadly I have started toning the horns out, which
may be a bad thing because one day you might actually be honking at me. Pray for me in traffic my friends worldwide J.
4. - Scents
and smells. Well India, I must say,
I love the smells of the food you cook.
Some Americans are not fans of curries and various other spices, but I
am. It is quite interesting while
walking around town to smell food cooking and then get smacked by some odd
smelling burning thing. I guess it
smells like rubber burning, but then the pleasant smell of Jasmine encircles
you. It is quite interesting, dynamic
and unforgettable. The jasmine thing is
perfect! Women and girls in the south
regularly wear fresh jasmine flowers in their hair. So you find people all over street corners
tying the jasmine garlands. Its calming,
its sweet, it’s a lovely smell. Whoever
came up with it was a genius and indeed, soon you will see me with it in my
hair too J.
5. - Colors. Much like your dynamic, interesting layers of
smells, your colors do the same things.
Buildings in the cities are multicolored, the streets are brown, the
saris and clothes are colorful, and the fruits, flowers, and other things sold
on corners lay on yet another layer. It
feels alive. It’s eye popping. It’s India’s cities. I love it!
6. - Word
choice. Ok, so I know we are all
speaking English and things vary depending on where you are in the world. Heck it varies even from state to state in
the USA. So why would I assume that
things would be any different here in India.
But my Indian friends, I must say that you may be overusing the word
“only” pronounced “wonly” here. You say
things like, “you are “wonly” coming back?”
HUH? (I am really asking you to
repeat yourself this time). Do you mean
am I just coming back, or am I coming back alone? Am I only going to come back to this specific
place place? Which one is it? I must ask because all three might be a
possibility…this same sentence goes for all three…I have heard it mean
each. Confusing! I am certain that in 5 minute conversation
with someone they will likely use “wonly” at least twice every min…so that is
10 only’s that I have no idea why they are using it. Most of the time I look at you guys for a
little longer and you rephrase your question.
You still use “wonly” in the sentence, but when you rephrase it the
place you put the only gives me more clear indicators of what you are talking
about. Funny thing is, all people I have
met that are English majors and Indian do not overuse the word only. So I think I am correct in thinking that it
probably does not fit in the sentence where you are putting it. I am sure you would be just as confused by
the American “like” as I am with the Indian “wonly”. Example: "I like saw my friend at the mall and I was like so excited to see her. She was like, 'I really like your jeans.' And I was like, 'Do you really like, like them?'" To my Indian friends, I am sure I lost you like 4 likes ago :-). Heck, the overuse of like confuses Americans sometimes! So I feel the same way when you say "only" a bunch of times in "like one sentence". :-)
So this was meant to be funny and
informative. These are some of the
things western foreigners may be thinking as they interact with your culture. There are more that are equally as confusing,
but I must say I have enjoyed every minute of the discoveries. While our differences are clear, it is
refreshing to know that at the heart of human beings, we are all the same. We all love; we all laugh; we all get sad,
and at some point may cry. I appreciate
your hospitality and the sense of humor you all have as I make mistakes navigating
your culture. At some point or another,
I won’t be shocked anymore, I promise.
And you will probably stop wondering what’s up with me. (I see you all staring at me on the train and
when I walk around campus…I know I look and act weird to you too). The most important thing is that we continue
to build friendships worldwide, recognize our differences and be gracious
enough to accept that there are many ways to the same end.
Sincerely Your Learning Visitor,
Aisha
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